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Sunday, December 29, 2013

House II: The Second Story (1987)

Do you want to know how to waste 7.8 million dollars?  House II is the answer!  Director Steve Miner is back with over twice the budget of the original film.  The results are horrifyingly bad.  Let’s start with the plot which involves young Jesse who inherits an old house that he quickly discovers is a bit haunted.  [A classic set-up].  Then things go downhill fast.  At the center of the story is a crystal skull that various demons and reanimated corpses try to possess.   First, Jesse’s great great grandfather is resurrected.  Then we meet a few really bad puppets, followed by Aztec warriors and a virgin sacrifice [I kid you not].  The cherry on the top of this sundae is Hallmark sentimentality that makes you want to throw up in your mouth just a title bit.  It’s all horrifyingly bad.

The biggest waste of an actor is Royal Dano who play’s the aforementioned great, great grandfather.  He is a marvelous character actor with a long resume in films dating all the way back to 1922!  The crap they give him to work with is unforgivable and painful to watch.  The only bright spot in House II is a brief cameo by John Ratzenberger [Cliff from Cheers].  He steals the show as the wacky electrician.  Unfortunately, it’s not enough to save this sinking Titanic of a film.

Do yourself a favor, and skip this one altogether!

RATING: Bad.

For more info check out the film's entry in IMDB.


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